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Friday, July 23, 2010

Clarity of Night Flash Fiction Entry

I’ve never won, placed, or garnered an honorable mention in the ‘Clarity of Night’ short fiction contest over the last few years I’ve been entering, but it was always fun coming up with a flash fiction entry along with reading other writers’ fiction. Because there have been so many entries, Jason from ‘Clarity of Night’ who hosts the contest had to limit the ones posted to top forties scoring. I can sure understand the headache of posting all of them. Reading all the entries so I could vote for the top five in the Reader’s Choice part of the contest was always a challenge. I can imagine how tough it is setting up the entries and posting them. In any case, mine didn’t make the top forties scoring so I’ll do a flash fiction post here with my entry and the picture above Jason based the contest 'Uncovered' on. Comment here if you wish and be sure to check out the top forties qualifiers over at ‘Clarity of Night’. They are exceptionally good. It’s going to be another tough vote for the Reader’s Choice award.  :)

A Dish Best Served Cold

The stones tumbled from the gasping man’s hand into a brown thatch peaking up from the snow. He twisted onto his side, holding a hand up in pleading fashion, spitting blood in order to talk.
“There! Take them and be damned!”
“You nearly killed my wife taking them. She’ll be in physical therapy for a year. I plan on making the next half hour seem like a year to you.”
“She… she wouldn’t tell me where they were hidden. I…”
A hiking boot in the stomach jackknifed the prone man, leaving him with no air to talk or scream with. His attacker waited.
“Don’t… don’t hurt me anymore. I’ll give you anything… I’ll…”
“I found everything you had while finding you. How’d you think I tracked you here? Your two accomplices that held Jolene down while you raped and beat her ratted out quick. They died faster than you will be.”
“Go to hell!” The man spat more blood, flailing for handholds to inch away, gathering strength for a last ditch attempt to fight back.
The boot launched again, stomping knees. Another scream echoed in the bleak landscape. The avenger knelt next to his victim’s sobbing form.
“Been in hell three weeks waiting for my Jolene to come out of her coma. She’s a fighter. Her first words described you three cretins. Let me show you a preview of hell.”
The rapist died twenty minutes later. His killer walked away without a glance at his victim or the cursed stones.


Charles Gramlich said...

Pretty good. Oddly enough, it reads almost like a scene I was working on last night.

BernardL said...

Great minds think alike, Charles. :)

raine said...

I like the style. It's brutally honest, the avenger's anger is palpable, and the pace really moves the reader along.
Thanks for sharing it with us, Bernard. :)

BernardL said...

Thanks for commenting, Raine. It's always a kick coming up with 250 word stories for Jason's contests. I've read a couple of the forties finalists I really like. The new format sure makes it easier to read all the entries.

Bernita said...

A very satisfying piece of writing, Bernard.

BernardL said...

I appreciate your comment, Bernita. Thank you. My pick for the contest winner was Child's Play #12 by Precie. It marked only the second time any contest pick I thought would make it actually placed. The other time was Charles' Reader's Vote winner. :)