You're In The Wrong Trade

I wrote these for an on-line trade organization I belong to, and they were a hit, so I thought maybe the couple people who stop by might get a smile out of them. :)

If you think you’re a Mechanic and:

(1) The sight of your own blood bothers you, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(2) You don’t like scars covering ninety-five percent of the visible skin on your hands and arms, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(3) You like getting out of bed without a virtual symphony of sound from your joints, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(4) You cannot refrain from using a hammer on anything your head collides with at work, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(5) You can only tolerate a moderate amount of pain; then come back when pain causes you to smile, because it makes you forget you’re a half an hour over book time, or brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(6) You think you can fix anything on four wheels, and want someone to care, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(7) It hurts your feelings when complete strangers belittle you wrongly, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(8) You lose your temper if you don’t have all the applicable info for a given job, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(9) You hate the smell of hot oil, or rain runoff down your neck, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

(10) You want recognition for the blood, pain, thousands of hours, and thousands of dollars you put into training and tooling, brother, you’re in the wrong trade.

:)